Saturday, April 6, 2013

F is for Fling

Such a fun sounding word, fling is. How light-weight and temporary. Poppycock, and I use the pun advisedly. This Romance Righter is appalled by the casual fling.


Why the outrage? What’s the problem with a fling? Monogamy can get pretty damn boring. Maybe bringing some new tricks home can perk up life there, too. Maybe a fling, with the elements of danger, intrigue, and novelty will re-activate a tepid sex life.


Yeah, right. Look to thyself if you find yourself spouting bilge like that. Bored? Maybe your partner is, too? And just how do them apples sit in your tummy? What would your reaction be to discovering your partner had a harmless little fling? (I’ve got a tickler file on this one for later novel writing.)


Oh, you’re bored? You think you’re the only one bored? Don’t bet the farm on it. Boredom typically cuts both ways.


What is at risk is the trust of your partner. What is also at risk is whether or not another partner will trust you after knowing of your betrayal of someone else’s trust. Oh, and did I mention the likelihood (not possibility, but likelihood) of getting and passing along a STD?


Is a fling worth eroding trust, the bedrock, fundamental component of a relationship?


Don’t kid yourself. A fling is not harmless or without victims. The effects of a revealed fling can resonate way longer than the initial betrayal. You might just be flinging away a relationship for a temporary thrill. Rather, fling yourself back into the original relationship with renewed vigor and enthusiasm. Or do everyone a favor, and walk away before you hurt people even more.


  1. Oh believe me, a fling on either of our parts will be a relationship ender. I won't tolerate it and neither will he. Once trust is gone, you can't get it back. So I know that he & I will be a-OK b/c we have zero intention of jeopardizing the amazing, happy and loving relationship we have.

  2. "Rather, fling yourself back into the original relationship with renewed vigor and enthusiasm."

    Hear, hear! Very well put, indeed.
    Some Dark Romantic

    PS: You may wish to consider removing the word verification step - it might boost your comment count if you do. :-)